Thursday, October 22, 2015

Boaty's Post #7: Learning to Love through a Love Map

Before learning this week I had heard of the term ‘Love Map’ before, but I never really knew anything else beyond that. I learned what a Love Map is and that to Dr. Gottman it is the “term for [the] part of [the] brain where [one stores] the relevant information about [their] partner’s life.” I love the way Dr. Gottman explains his terminology. Through looking back on my parents’ marriage and the beginning stages of my marriage, I can slowly start to appreciate how much of our happiness relies on how much we know about our spouses.

From the section principle entitled “Nurturing Your Fondness and Admiration” Dr. Gottman answered a question that I had from the leaning about the Four Horsemen. I wondered “what could help couples with eradicating contempt from their marriage?” the answer became clear in this weeks reading. “The couples need to learn how to love, appreciate, and honor their spouse.” I never really realized before how important it is to let our spouses know that we admire them and are proud of their accomplishments.

I actually had an experience last night where I had to stay home while my husband went to the campus for a meeting to form a new society or group here on campus. He was so nervous about whether enough people would come or be interested. While I was finishing up homework he rushed into the home to tell me how their meeting was a great success and that they are one big step closer to getting the society started. He was so happy and I was able to convey my feelings of admiration and pride in his accomplishments. After telling me more about the meeting I could feel a deep connection with him as I felt and expressed genuine excitement with him.

Even from one small experience I can feel personally how important it is to love, appreciate, and honor our spouses.

No comments:

Post a Comment